Yes, friends, the booking list for the 17th of February is now completely full, if not a little overfull. We’re full up. Running from the nose, so we are.
As you know, we save about 35 spaces on the door for those who don’t fancy advance planning, and if you turn up on time, you should get a spot. We don’t really recommend people coming ridiculously early because we’re still setting up then, and you’ll see our frantic side, and we don’t want to end up with the same situation you used to get down at the Garda National Immigration Bureau, where you used to have to turn up at like 6am just to stand in the queue because some people thought it was important to get there at 4am, and then other people started turning up at 5, and there were so many people standing on Harcourt Street by 6:30 that it sometimes snaked all the way down to the Bleeding Horse, and you couldn’t even leave to go to the bathroom.
The earlier people got there, the earlier you had to turn up, then stand around for three hours in the hope you’d get seen before nightfall, when other people would already be turning up to camp outside, and the same commuters who passed by in the morning passed again in the evening, and you could hear the same racial slurs only in less-rested voices. And you knew that the angry civil servant behind one of the only two or three windows that would be open would probably send you home without your stamp, sometimes for presenting him or her with too much information. I learned the difficult way that they do not, in fact, wish to hear a short list, compiled while queuing, of ways that they could make the running of the office more efficient. I had to go back three times that year until they finally renewed me.
No, 7:30 is reasonable. We won’t even stamp your passport much earlier than that.
We still have room on our booking list for the 23rd, of course, so don’t fret if you want to pre-book!
And remember, even if you’ve booked in, you gotta make sure at least some of your team arrives on time because we can only hold tables for 10 minutes or so if there’s a queue! There was one last month, so, y’know.
If you won’t make it to either one, you can still participate by answering our bumper 40-question Big Sex Chaos Uh-Oh Survey, which will help us with one of our very important Family Fortunes games. Please email chaosdublin at gmail dot com if you want to have a go. Yer ma did.
But now for more important, far more exciting, non-housekeeping news. On Tuesday the 2nd of February, December storyteller Kathleen O’Rourke, a.k.a. Granny O’Grimm was nominated for a much-deserved Academy Award. An Oscar. Her Chaos story isn’t up on our site just yet, but will be in the next few days, but we really can’t say enough good stuff about Kathleen. We know the world isn’t a meritocracy, but her nomination restores our faith just a tiny bit, and if she does return from Hollywood in her stained Michael Guiney Couture sateen pantsuit carrying that little statuette of a nude and hairless man, we’ll just have to find a way to best it. As she said in her story last year, “You can’t eat awards,” but we know this is the beginning of a much more generous regular food budget for Ms O’Rourke, and we couldn’t be happier.
We’re not afraid to admit that we’re a little swollen with pride on your behalf. You’ll be buying name-brand and in-date food in no time.
As for Sex Chaos on the 17th, we recommend you watch and learn. I remember dancing to this song at the only junior high dance I ever went to. As you listen, picture a fat girl child with braces and off-brand clothes, dancing toward adolescent boys, who recoil until they are flush with the wall. Oh my.
Katrina pointed out to me that Kathleen totally had her party at The Glimmerman and it was in the paper and I was so excited that I might post it on my fridge and tell everyone I KNOW her! And I go to that pub! and when she gets world famous she will probably say hi to me if I approach her in the streets!!! And then I can tell her about the photo on my fridge and invite her for pints in the Glimmerman! And she might say no, but in a polite way.
Siiiiigh.
Unrelated: Can we learn this dance Jane and perform it at Sex Chaos. I am sitting on my sofa in my leotard all ready to rehearse.
I dunno, do you think it’s easier or harder than All The Single Ladies? I’m always wearing my leotard, by the way. I have what’s called a ‘permatard’, which is a surgically-attached dance costume. I really recommend it.